Sunday, September 30, 2007

The Fate of Humanity...

...sometimes seems bleak.

I'm working on a book of essays about genocide studies. Many of them are classic scholarly dissections of who said what and when, and whether the author agrees or respectfully thinks they're morons.

But then there are the other chapters:
Nazis vs. Poland
English vs. Aborigines
Germans vs. Herero and San
Spanish vs. Inca
Turks vs. Armenians
Cambodians vs. Vietnamese vs.
Canadians vs. Blackfoot

and the list goes on and on and on...

It's a pretty depressing assignment. To think that there's enough genocide in human history that there are legions of scholars dissecting it, and journals and books devoted to it -- well, it's just sad.

I'd like to end on a happy note, something about rubbing noses with my darling daughter or giant little-boy hugs. But I've got a headache and this book's taking forever to finish. I think I'm going to play computer games now...mindless entertainment sounds pretty good.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Two Things

Another night, more fried brain cells. The rest of the week will probably have to be a non-work-related-Internet-free zone. Most of my 7 loyal readers have seen and/or done this one already, so no tags today.


Two Names You Go By:

  1. Mama
  2. Pookie (my mother only, thank you!)

Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:

  1. blue tie-dye t-shirt
  2. abalone shell hair clip (no, I'm not actually a hippie, but I play one occasionally)

Two Things You Would Want (or have) in a Relationship:

  1. trust
  2. laughter

Two of Your Favorite Things to Do:

  1. waste time on Facebook/blogging
  2. knitting and crocheting

Two Things You Want Very Badly At The Moment:

  1. someone to wash the dishes and do the laundry
  2. five more days added to this week before my latest project is due

Two Longest Car Rides:

  1. from Los Angeles to Corvallis, Oregon (900 miles, when I was a baby and again at 7 years old)
  2. from New York City to Augusta, Georgia (800 miles, coming up at the beginning of next month!)

Two Favorite Holidays:

  1. Christmas/Hannukah
  2. Halloween

Two Favorite Beverages:

  1. coffee
  2. homemade kefir

Two Things About Me You May Not Have Known:

  1. I can read Italian fairly well.
  2. I can't swim and have no desire to.

Two Jobs I Have Had in My Life:

  1. library page
  2. running a bag-sealing machine in an electronics parts factory

Two Movies I Would Watch Over and Over:

  1. Amadeus
  2. White (Trois Couleurs)

Two Places I Have lived:

  1. Pollock Pines, CA
  2. Newport Beach, CA

Two of My Favorite Foods:

  1. sushi
  2. bacon

Two Places I’d Rather Be Right Now:

  1. Vienna
  2. a cruise ship with Waldorf-style child care!


Monday, September 24, 2007

Happy Birthday Big Boy!

Today SillyBilly is 5 years old. I'm having a hard time digesting that...how did he get so big? And I mean big: he's been wearing 6X shirts for a while and has size 12 1/2 feet!

On this day 5 years ago, he was being rushed to the NICU via ambulance while Anthropapa dazedly called people to let them know (He completely forgot to tell my mother what hospital we were in, so she ended up calling my work number and talking to my lead who was fielding my calls, who then told her the names of all the local hospitals. Mom had to call all of them until she figured out where we were!), and I groggily tried to recover from the emergency c-section and essentially could not really comprehend what had happened.

It's hard to believe that those things didn't just happen a few days ago. But, it's true -- SillyBilly is growing up. He's potty trained now (mostly). He has progressed from bassinet to crib to toddler bed, and if we had room for it he would fit into a twin bed nicely now. He will someday soon learn to read and write, and learn to ride his bike sans training wheels.

Let me tell you a bit more about my big boy. He is:

  • a tough cookie. He has hidden reserves of strength that showed from the start. Despite the trauma and illness at his birth, he found a way to survive and flourish. Here's the first day I got to hold him, 21 days after his birth. He had made it over the hump and was only 10 days away from coming home:
  • full of love. If you want the best hug ever, he's your man. He has mastered the art of the "Dr. Crackit," defined by my dad as a big, big, hug that borders on a chiropractic adjustment.
  • full of joy:
  • a social butterfly. He will run right up to strangers to share his recent discoveries, and goes into transports whenever he sees someone he knows walking down the street.
  • a lover of tools.
  • a ready helper. He can put out the compost into the big bin, dry dishes, feed the cats, set the table, cut vegetables (with a sharp knife!), and even stir sauces.
  • a good brother. Though he has his share of spats and selfishness, he does look after his sister and will sometimes even share his toys. He just needs a little practice, that's all.
  • a champion eater. He's always been on the skinny side, but lately he seems to be making up for lost time. Can you say third helpings?
  • an eagle eye. I have the world's most amazing feather collection, and he can find any kind of rock you would like, any time. And just try to make a tiny change in decor without him noticing.
  • an awesome artist. He has made some amazing cardboard creations, makes about 40 gazillion drawings per week, and is also and accomplished sculptor. Check out this playdough birthday cake, complete with flaming candles:
  • gorgeous. You could fall right into those dark brown eyes.
My dear sweetie boy, you have embarked on your sixth year on this Earth. I wish you health, happiness, and all good things. Big smooches and hugs from your Mama.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Brain Fried...

Only enough neurons available for a meme....

The Name Game, via Helen and Charlotte.

1. My rock star name (first pet and current car)

Chaucer Chrysler

(I think I'll be working the county fair circuit with that one.)

2. My gangsta name (ice cream flavour plus cookie, or biscuit)

Chocolate Ginger-O

3. My fly girl name (first letter of first name, first three letters of last name)

K-Hun

(Sounds like some ancient Aramaic curse. With my maiden name it would be K-Joh. Now I'm a Korean fly girl.)

4. My detective name (favourite colour, favourite animal)

Tangerine Fox

(Or, my porn star name.)

5. My soap opera name (middle name, city of birth)

Elaina Santa Monica

6. My Star Wars name (first three letters of your last name, first two of your first name)

Hun-Kr

(She-Ra's ugly stepsister.)

7. My superhero name (second favourite colour, favourite drink, add “the”)

The Green Mocha

(Or, time to clean out the coffee machine.)

8. My Nascar name (first two names of my two grandfathers)

Nils Walter

(Clearly, the Swedish NASCAR.)

9. My stripper name (favourite perfume, favourite sweet)

Rosewater Scharffenberger

(Clearly, a Teutonic stripper.)

10. My witness protection name (mother’s and father’s middle names)

Esther Vernon

(Petunia Dursley's best friend.)

11. My weather anchor name (fifth grade teacher’s name, a major city beginning with the same letter)

Grossman Geneva

(Perhaps I should try his first name: how about Alan Glasgow?)

12. My spy name (favourite season/flower)

Autumn Tulip

13. Cartoon name (favourite fruit plus garment you’re wearing, with an “ie” or “y” added)

Pear Jeansie

14 Hippie name (what you ate for breakfast plus favourite tree)

Ricepancake Whiteoak

15. Your rockstar tour name (favourite hobby plus weather element, with “the”)

The Crocheting Fog

(Or perhaps this would be my "two days before Christmas presents must be done" name.)

Friday, September 14, 2007

Oh, My Lord...Who Has the Time?

I just came across this in my daily Craftzine blog email:


The E-Bento daily lunch diary! I want someone to make me lunches like that!

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Bittersweet

Yesterday it was my birthday,
I hung one more year on the line.
I should be depressed,
My life's a mess,
But I'm having a good time
-Paul Simon


OK, that's a slight exaggeration. I wouldn't say my life is a mess, though there is a steady level of chaos. But overall, I am having a good time.

Yesterday we had the traditional Anthrofamily birthday bagels with lox and cream cheese for breakfast, and a sushi dinner with chocolate cake for dessert (the disfigured cake was redeemed with some chocolate sauce drizzled on top). I got some sweet presents, including random "precious" items from the toy shelf lovingly wrapped up by the kids. Napoleona kept throwing her arms around me, smothering me with kisses, and saying Happy Birthday Mama four gazillion times.

Yesterday was also the anniversary of my stepbrother Jonathan's death at the World Trade Center. I never knew him, but I have become close to my stepfather over the intervening years and have seen the toll this tragedy has taken on him. Now that I live near NYC I think about Jonathan often. I think about his children, 11 months and 3 years old at the time of his death.

My birthday was not "ruined" by the events of 9/11/01 as many people comment. Changed forever, yes -- the reality of our mortality and life's transitory nature has been brought close to mind.

I've known mothers who will not let their family members out of sight without saying "I love you," out of fear that one of them might die without hearing those words one last time. I cannot live in fear like that. I resolve to make sure in every way possible that my family knows how much I care for them, but from a foundation of love, not fear.

Everything that I read and hear of Jonathan tells me that he lived with exuberance and joy, and that friends and family rejoiced in his passions and affection. That's a better role model, I think.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Monday Mishmash

I'm serving up myself a nice hot dish of humble pie* for dessert tonight....

Yesterday I made the following comment on someone's blog :

"I don't think TV is appropriate for young children at all, and only in small doses for older children."

I followed that up by entertaining my children for a half an hour looking at pictures and YouTube videos of animals from the cuteoverload.com site.

I loathe the overly cutesy captions and comments, but we were all cracking up at kittens attacking empty boxes, overfed hamsters, and the world's tiniest snail.

I know, I know.

It's just that when the kidlets wake up from their nap and I'm already on the computer, they immediately beg for pictures of dinosaurs or puppies or whatever. And I'm weak, I'M WEAK, I TELL YOU!

*I just love Wikipedia: where else can you find the following things all related to each other: Offal | Savoury pies | English idioms?

* * *

This afternoon SillyBilly reminded me of his greatest superpower: eagle-eye vision. (The boy can spot the tiniest things, as well as the one thing that you didn't want him to notice, or the one tiny thing that you changed in the room.) He noticed a visitor in my bedroom window:


Though I hate tormenting creatures, I just had to go outside and bring this amazing mantis in for the kids to see. (It was raining, and the thought of getting the kids ready to go outside in rain gear before the mantis left was beyond me at that moment.) It was mostly reddish brown, with bright green wings peeking out. And about 6 inches long!

I had caught it in a large glass water pitcher, and the mantis showed us his amazing superpower by crawling all the way up the sheer, slippery side of the pitcher and almost escaping!

* * *

Tomorrow is my birthday (yes, it's a nice birthday to have. I just get a little extra pondering of mortality every year now). I decided to make my own birthday cake. Mostly to give the kids a project, but also because the last store-bought cake we ate just wasn't that good, and this way I at least know what the ingredients are and can pronounce them!

I also decided to try out my spiffy cake pan that I bought a long time ago:


Of course, I don't have a recipe for this pan's shape or volume, but with my trusty Joy of Cooking I was feeling no fear. I used the Sour Cream Chocolate Cake recipe.

Now, I seem to have a constitutional inability to follow recipes exactly as written. Though this time it wasn't all my fault: Anthropapa had bought some almond extract so I just had to add some, and we didn't have enough sour cream so I improvise a half cup of whole milk and lemon juice.

The kids had a great time sifting and stirring, though mostly they liked licking the spoons. Coming out of the oven, all seemed well:


I hadn't expected the batter to completely fill the pan, and in any case I could live without a little train around the bottom of my cake.

The problem occurred when I tried to get the cake to come out:


I don't know if the batter just wasn't quite right for the pan, or I didn't grease the pan enough, or didn't let it cool enough before attempting it.

Whatever. It will still taste good, especially after I melt some more chocolate to drizzle on top.

Shove a few candles in it, and pass me a fork!

Saturday, September 08, 2007

A Little Help for a Friend

I normally don't advertise here, but I just discovered that a friend has a website for her amazing artwork.

Judit makes beautiful pictures from wool, in the manner described in Magic Wool. She plant-dyes much of the wool herself, and I can say from seeing these works in person that they are masterfully done.

Check them out!

Friday, September 07, 2007

A Literary Heroine Has Died

Madeleine L'Engle was a favorite author during my youth. I read and re-read her books obsessively. The Wrinkle in Time books were some of the first science fiction/fantasy I had ever encountered. In later years I even came to have crushes on some of her characters, like Adam and Joshua from The Arm of the Starfish.

As a child of suburban Southern California, I was always fascinated by her depictions of life on the East Coast and exotic locations around the world, as well as by the dynamics of large families. I could not fathom how it would be to have so many siblings! And how it was to live in Manhattan or Connecticut in brownstones and farm houses...I could hardly grasp it, but it was intriguing.

The thing that fascinated me most was how characters crossed over from her two main story groups: Chronos (the Austins) and Kairos (the Murry-O'Keefes). It was the first time I had experienced a writer essentially creating an entire world that spanned multiple books.

I will miss her.

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Mad mildew marauders

Spent an hour yesterday morning madly cleaning out the bathtub and the shower curtain, which despite being "mildew resistant" was not, in fact, mildew-proof. I thought it might help to remove one source of mildew in the house, because the boy is having another asthma episode.

He spent a lovely morning over the weekend, puttering around with his Papa in the basement. The basement that is rather mildewy and is in the process of being organized and cleaned out in anticipation of a possible move this winter.

The puttering was lovely, the mildew was not. He's been having (as we all have had -- thank you, goldenrod and wild molds) lots of gunk in his throat, but over the weekend he developed asthma.

Seems like these episodes come on so suddenly. It would be one thing if he was one of those kids who has to take his meds every day, but overall was functional. That at least would have some rhythm. SillyBilly is functional for a few months and then WHAM! something sets it off. Usually a virus -- this time I think the mold.

So we saw the pediatrician today after loading the boy up with far too much albuterol, sometimes even double doses twice as often. Bad sign, that. We resigned ourselves to giving him the evil pink stuff. As our wonderful doctor put it, giving the boy a bit of it every few months and heading off these attacks before they really go full bore is a sight better than giving him lots of steroids all the time.

We're still working with the homeopathic anthroposophical remedies, but they're kind of supplementary when the wheezing gets too bad. This time it was bad enough that he had a hard time talking and vomited a few times. Almost a trip to the ER, but we worked through it.

Sigh.

Update: The boy is much better. We gave him two doses of evil pink stuff, and that seemed to put the brakes on things. Still lots of congestion, but he's not fighting for air any more. And he got to go to the first day of daycare after all. Now I just need to figure out how to get him to take naps when he's sick....

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Madame Anthromama's Art Lesson

I know that according to Waldorf early childhood principles, I should not use too many words or abstract concepts with my children. But sometimes, I just can't help myself....

SillyBilly loves to tell his sister what to do and how to do it. This often occurs when they are at the table "arting." They sit facing each other, sharing a large bin of paper, crayons, construction paper, etc.

SillyBilly is always telling Napoleona, "that's not how you draw X" or "that doesn't look like a Y."

This makes me crazy.

So, the other day I got fed up. I went to the shelf and pulled out Gombrich's The Story of Art, and called the boy over.

I showed him pictures of the Annunciation throughout the ages (chosen simply because they are ubiquitous). I asked him, do any of them look the same? He said no. I pointed out that none of them are "wrong."


Then we looked at some paintings by Van Gogh, one of his favorite artists. I asked, does the sky really have swirls in it? He said no.


I asked, do people really have green and purple and yellow and orange spots on their faces? He said no. And I pointed out that these are still beautiful paintings.


I hope that I didn't go overboard, but it just seemed so important to me that he understand this. I hope that he sees that there isn't just one way to do things, and that there are ways to do things that don't necessarily depict what's "real" but are still valid. And I hope that pointing out "reality" doesn't crush his imagination in some way.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

How can pasteurized almonds be raw?

They can't. But evidently the USDA thinks they can be. Almonds must now be pasteurized, yet they can be sold labeled as "raw."

This seems to be yet another case of government double-speak, which though cloaked in the guise of "protecting consumers," really just deludes consumers with false advertising.

Sure, we all want our food to be safe, yummy, and healthy. Many people choose raw foods for those reasons, and accept any perceived inherent risks in doing so.

But in this case, the two salmonella "outbreaks," in 2001 and 2004, sickened a few dozen people. Let's put that into perspective: according to the article, the US produces 1.3 billion pounds of almonds every year.

So to counteract an extremely rare occurrence of food contamination (one that could be prevented through better-enforced or enhanced cleanliness measures in processing plants), all almonds must be sterilized? With a chemical so carcinogenic it was banned as racing fuel?

And here's the real kicker: according to the article, less than 10% of almonds consumed are raw anyway.

So the USDA is going to take away the option for an informed consumer to obtain raw domestic almonds (unless you are lucky enough to live in California's Central Valley, where all US almond are grown, and can find them in a farmer's market or farm stand where selling raw almonds will still be legal), and will yet again drive small farmers out of the business because of onerous and expensive processing requirements.

Makes me want to vote Libertarian, I tell you.

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

Mom goes shopping, gains $142.51

My lovely husband Anthropapa just sent me a link to this, which is the funniest eBay offering I have ever seen.

Who knew that someone could get someone else to pay that much for a package (opened, even) of Pokemon cards just for writing a witty description? Makes me want to consider my "I'm not a writer, I'm an editor" stance.

Sometimes I wonder why Anthropapa isn't doing something more constructive with his time than perusing Digg, like cleaning something or writing that grad school essay, and then I remember to be thankful for the entertainment break, and go back to my own constructive work, blogging.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Multifarious distractions

I should be working right now (modernizing the style of a philosophy book translated into overly formal English from German many years ago -- I just can't get excited about it right now!) but instead I'm gazing out the window at some amazingly tall wildflowers waving about in today's rainstorm.

Ooop, yes, that's got me out of my seat and searching for my wildflower book ... very tall upright plant, bright yellow flowers, petals arching back ... crosscheck with Google images ... YES! We have identified it: Rudbeckia laciniata, the green-headed coneflower.

The kids are at Camp Enchantment, hubby is puttering around in the kitchen making homemade bread and soup (bless him!) and I'm seriously considering turning off the computer and lounging on the bed with a cat and a book.

It's that kind of day.

I'll end with some photos from last weekend's trip to the Met Museum.

Here's SillyBilly excitedly telling us something we didn't know about the Neo-Assyrian Nimrud reliefs. Note: he picked out that outfit, I wash my hands of it!

A detail of E. A. Abbey's King Lear: Act 1, Scene 1, which completely shocked me as I rounded a corner in the American Wing. This is a massive painting [54.25 x 127.25 in. (137.8 x 323.2 cm)], and was created during the late 1890's, one of my favorite art periods. The full painting can be seen here.



And this room in the American Wing, which despite its Victorian fussiness felt oddly homey and comfortable to me. Maybe it was the absolute lack of toys, cat hair, and dirty dishes?

Monday, August 20, 2007

Do you wonder why we call her Napoleona?

Heard said after we came in from playing one afternoon:
Napoleona: "I took off my hat. My hair is too beautiful to cover up with a hat."

Also...
Napoleona: "I want to be a princess for Halloween!"
Papa: "Really?"
Napoleona: "Of course, I'm a princess all the time."



Saturday, August 11, 2007

Out of the Mouths of Babes, VIII


SillyBilly: Are Hansel and Gretel real?
Mama: (dodging and weaving like #42) That depends on what you mean by "real."
SillyBilly: Real means real!! (He said this as if he'd already reached the stage where I am a complete idiot. Five going on fifteen, that's my boy.)
Mama: Remember our conversation about thoughts and feelings being real even though you can't see or touch them?
Papa: When you feel hungry, is that real?
SillyBilly: YES!!! (As real as our grocery bill. I'm waiting for the day it exceeds our rent. By then I'm sure the owner of our local Chinese food buffet will have made enough off us to buy that vacation house in the Bahamas.)
Mama: But you can't see your hunger, right?
Papa: So stories are real in the same kind of way. But if you're asking if there were people named Hansel and Gretel who had an adventure with a witch, then...we don't know.
SillyBilly: When we die and go up to heaven, we can find out what's real.

This conversation happened the day after I chose to read the kids Hansel and Gretel while waiting in a doctor's office. It was really too scary for them: the mother was dead? the stepmother wanted to leave the kids in the forest? the witch wanted to cook the kids and eat them? It's really a story for ages 6 and up (according to wise Waldorf kindergarten teachers).

But we just couldn't resist getting all philosophical about "real." Don't get me started on The Velveteen Rabbit.

Ed.: I just realized that I had a previous conversation written down that would explain how we had already talked about "real":

SillyBilly: What's reality?
(Papa hands off to Mama, even though he's the philosopher in the family.)
Mama: Some people say that reality is things that we can touch or see, and things like stories and pretending aren't real.
Papa: But other things like thoughts and feelings are real.
Mama: Some people believe that God is real even though we don't see him or touch him.
Napoleona: God is a spirit!
SillyBilly: God is the biggest spirit of all.

We were being bad Waldorf parents, using lots of words and abstractions with preschoolers who are more in movement and the will. But on the other hand, we were meeting SillyBilly where he is now. How to balance that?!

Thursday, August 09, 2007

More Waldorf school PR struggles...

...this time in Australia.

I don't know how the state schools incorporate Waldorf/Steiner methods in Australia -- if they are fully independent, charter schools (as in California) where some state requirements must be met, or some other structure.

But I do know a bit about the methods of education and the anthroposophical thought behind it, and feel moved to respond to some of the comments in the article:

"Critics say that its philosophical basis is too religious -- even comparing it to Scientology -- to be in the secular public system.

But supporters deny Steiner education is religious and argue it is a holistic approach to learning."

Anthroposophy is spiritual. In the anthroposophical view, all of human existence is imbued with spirit. Therefore any human interaction -- be it in a Waldorf/Steiner school, a public school, the grocery store, a prison -- involves the spiritual world. Only when we come from a materialistic, dualistic viewpoint does the concept of "secularity vs. spirituality" arise.

Waldorf/Steiner schools do not teach a religion to the students. They do foster the natural sense of awe, wonder, and respect for the world that children have. Anthroposophy is a philosophical world-view, not a religion. You can follow any religion you like, or none at all, and still work with anthroposophy.

"Supporters of Steiner are adamant anthroposophy is not taught to children, and that Steiner himself said the spiritual science was only for adults who chose to do it.

But parents and religious experts are concerned that Steiner teachers learn about anthroposophy in their training and these beliefs seep into the classroom. 'What a lot of people don't get is that Steiner is based on a spiritual system not an educational one,' says cult expert Raphael Aron.... It is implicit in everything they do."

Anthroposophy is never taught directly to children (though in some schools here in the US I believe it is included in some high school senior classes about world religion). Steiner specifically stated that teachers should never speak of anthroposophy directly to students: "If anyone thinks the Waldorf School is a school for Anthroposophy it shows he has no understanding either of Waldorf School pedagogy or of Anthroposophy." (Spiritual Ground of Education, lecture 8 of 8/24/1922.)

But yes, of course, it is the foundation of Waldorf/Steiner methods. Of course the beliefs "seep into the classroom," but only in that everything that the teacher brings to the students is informed by the anthroposophical worldview, not that it is included in the curriculum. If teachers are including anthroposophy in their curricula, they are making a mistake.

"[Aron] said there was a lack of transparency in the schools and often parents were not told about what Steiner believed, making it not dissimilar to Scientology."

I can't speak about Scientology, but I believe that it is possible, and perhaps even common, that schools are not forthright and clear enough with parents about anthroposophy. Part of the problem stems from what I perceive as a fear of talking about some of the beliefs outright, because they are far outside the mainstream. Guardian angels, etheric bodies, reincarnation, karma, elemental beings...these all come into play, albeit mostly in minor ways. And personally I don't think these things are the crux of the pedagogy anyway, but I can see how some of these beliefs could come as a shock to parents, especially if not presented in a clear way.

However I also think that it's unreasonable to expect schools to discuss every belief that informs the pedagogy. Steiner gave about 6,000 lectures during his lifetime -- how would it even be possible to fully "disclose" anthroposophy to prospective parents? Do Catholic schools describe every bit of doctrine to parents? Do Montessori schools give parents all of Maria Montessori's writings?

"Mr Pereira, who is from Sri Lanka, said his concerns about Steiner's racist beliefs were realised when his children were not allowed to use black or brown crayons because they were "not pure". He said Steiner teachers at the state-run school recommended they not immunise their children because it would lead to the 'bestialisation of humans'."

This to me sounds like teachers trying to explain concepts, and failing.

In early childhood, it is thought that children should experience color in a moving, feeling way, without too much hardened form, because that is the state of the children themselves: moving, feeling, still soft (bones, rounded bodies, etc.) and not fully incarnated. That is why children in Waldorf/Steiner schools do watercolor paintings instead of coloring pre-drawn images, and that is why black and brown are discouraged -- these colors are "earthly" and tend to create form instead of color experiences. I would say that calling them "impure" is not accurate.

And there are numerous explanations and thoughts about discouraging immunization, but using the word "bestialization" seems excessive and inaccurate. I've talked before about the issue of Steiner and racism; linking crayons and race is just silly. I think that people bring up the race card about Steiner because it immediately causes fear and doubt, and obscures real discussion.

"Rudolf Steiner Schools of Australia executive officer Rosemary Gentle said anthroposophy was not taught to children, although teachers were introduced to the subject during their training.

'It has nothing to do with what is taught. It is just the approach to teaching,' she said.

'The teachers are given an anthroposophy background ... and it allows them to look into a child more deeply. You look at children as you would in a family. You strive to understand the child and recognise their emerging personality.'"

Perhaps my comparison with Catholic schools was problematic, because it is an inherent goal of that school system to create more Catholics. Waldorf/Steiner schools do not work that way. Sure, if you think you've got the best way to view reality, you hope that everyone else will climb on your bandwagon so that everyone can benefit. And if you have a world-view of any kind, be it intellectual development at the expense of artistic and social skills or religion as the basis of all reality or anthroposophy or secular humanism or whatever, it will surely inform your actions.

But the commonly stated goal of Waldorf/Steiner education is not to create more anthroposophists. It is to provide a developmentally appropriate and healing curriculum to help the children become balanced, socially aware, and able to integrate all parts of their selves -- body, soul, and spirit -- into a healthy adult life.

Monday, August 06, 2007

Something extremely frivolous

This will take up far too much of your time, but I thought it was hilarious:

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, the Potterdammerung.

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Out of the Mouths of Babes, VII

Tonight at dinner I said something about bread, and SillyBilly made a joke about cows being bred (can't remember what exactly -- must keep my Moleskine notebook at hand!). I told him that was a synonym, and explained that means two different words that mean the same, or almost the same, thing.

We have talked about antonyms before: hot/cold, dry/wet, in/out. And homonyms: sale/sail, meet/meat, pale/pail. But synonyms were new.

Then Napoleona pipes up: "Like plate/dish!"

Napoleona is 3 years old, and she can spontaneously think of a synonym.

Then SillyBilly said, "Mama, I want to do copy editing just like you do!"

We are in serious trouble.

Friday, August 03, 2007

Does the parenting guilt ever end?

No, I think not.

SillyBilly has asthma. For almost a year after we relocated from California to New York, he had no wheezing. We thought perhaps he had grown out of it, or maybe something in the air in Cal. had caused the problem.

In the last few months things have started to flare up again. We had to renew prescriptions, and started to actually use the nebulizer that we had hardly ever used before.

We finally got an appointment with the anthroposophical doctor, who prescribed several remedies to be taken daily, as a long-term constitutional approach.

SillyBilly was thrilled to learn that one of the remedies is actually made of meteors! (ferrum sidereum -- helps with incarnation as well as finding equilibrium between outer influences and inner responses, e.g. asthma as a response to allergens).

We were doing well, remembering to take the remedies twice a day, plus an added bonus spoonful of local honey to assist with allergies, when early this week SillyBilly seemed to have a sniffly nose. The next day he had a little cough, but I wasn't too worried about it.

The next day he was having a lot of coughing and wheezing, so we arranged another visit to the doctor. He prescribed different remedies for the acute phase of asthma.

I dutifully gave SillyBilly one dose of these remedies when we got home, and within half an hour he was having a severe asthma attack! I gave him some albuterol through the nebulizer, and called the doctor. He called back and told us to stop all of the other remedies and just use the acute remedies every two hours.

So far, things are calming down. We have only given SillyBilly one nebulizer treatment today, which is down from several a day plus once or twice in the evenings, which is a whole lot of albuterol for a little guy. He even got to go to the last day of summer day camp, though he came home early because he was not feeling great. (Though that turned out to be more just needing his Mama than anything physical.)

Where does the guilt come in?

Well, SillyBilly has had trouble with his lungs since his birth. He had severe meconium aspiration after being overdue 4 1/2 weeks. He was in the hospital for 31 days, had to have VV ECMO (blood bypass to allow his lungs to rest) for 10 days, and almost died.

I am having trouble not blaming myself. I chose to skip being induced at 42 weeks. I chose to go with a lay midwife at the last minute instead of continuing with the allopathic doctor. And I have a hard time not thinking that those choices "caused" SillyBilly's lung problems.

I know it's both incorrect and unproductive to blame myself. SillyBilly has his own karma to work out, as do I. But dealing with a sick child now makes it all the harder to knock off that kind of thinking.